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Lunatic and other things 14.08.2018 01:49:48

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Lunatic and other things So this was my FB post around 11 this morning: “I didn’t go today. My foot was bothering me when I woke. Then my lunatic aunt gives me a heart attack as she goes up the stairs. I thought something was wrong with my mother. I get up, painfully walk to […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Sunday 12 Aug 2018 13.08.2018 01:29:10

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Sunday 12 Aug 18 I did a lot today when I didn’t want to. I planned on doing the laundry and then resting the rest of the day. My mother decided to call me before 10 am to do it as she emptied the hamper in the bathroom but couldn’t pick up the clothes to […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Tired of being exhausted and exasperated 12.08.2018 02:43:56

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Tired of being exhausted and exasperated I had another bad night of no sleeping until late in the morning. I honestly have no idea what time I went to sleep. Think I slept for a few hours and then had to use the bathroom because I drank water with a protein bar so I could […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Hurricane by Luke Combs 11.08.2018 02:09:05

coffee bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging writing blog chronic pain chronic illness
Hurricane by Luke Combs Fricken love this song. It is I think his first hit. I must have listened to it over a thousand times. Then when his album came out, I listened to One Number Away and it still stands as one of my top 25 songs on my MP3 player. I love Luke […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

9 Aug 2018 10.08.2018 01:23:54

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging chronic pain chronic illness
9 Aug 2018 I had wanted today to be a self-care day. I made breakfast and coffee, then went up to my room, hoping to finish Norse Mythology. I have a few chapter left. I played with my phone and then settled down to read. I read one chapter when the coffee made me really […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Twitter Rant: Body Dysmorphia 10.08.2018 03:33:04

bipolar disorder depression transgender disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging suicide blog
Twitter Rant: Body Dysmorphia I am having serious body dysmorphia because I am literally stuck in my female body and I want to be a male. but due to my pain condition, I can’t have T to move forward with my transition. I want top surgery but can’t have it because of $$$. I have […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Swear post warning offensive language here in 09.08.2018 07:38:33

psychiatry bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) psychotherapy complex regional pain syndrome cauda equina syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders suicidality physical pain suicide ideation blogging suicide blog chronic pain chronic illness
Swear post warning offensive language here in So about two hours ago, I was smelling something. Had no idea what the hell it was. I thought maybe a cord was burning, something was catching fire, checked all my wires and electrical stuff. Nothing. I go downstairs to see if my mother sprayed something, and it […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

8 Aug 2018 09.08.2018 01:01:26

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) planners complex regional pain syndrome crps depression baseball disability chronic physical pain mood disorders suicidality physical pain suicide ideation blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
8 Aug 2018 I had a good session with my therapist. I told him about the saga with my primary care office. I had to nurses, both beginning names with B that I called bubbleheads because that is what they are. After we talked about those idiots, I told him about how my suicidality was […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

6 August 2018 07.08.2018 01:29:39

therapist therapy bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) psychotherapy complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders psychotherapist physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
6 August 2018 I’ve decided for the month of August, I am going to use the date as my title, unless I can come up with a fancier title. I have found that I am just reusing my previous titles and coming up with something fresh is hard, after 6 years of blogging. Can’t believe […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Sunday blog 5 Aug 18 06.08.2018 02:54:52

coffee bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Sunday Blog 5 Aug 2018 I’m listening to 1989 again. I spent most of the day sleeping because I woke up around 0530 in pain. Tomorrow I got to go to the pharmacy and get more meds. I can’t fill the ER ones but I think I can fill the ones I take as PRN. […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Saturday Blog 4 Aug 2018 05.08.2018 01:19:41

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Saturday Blog 4 Aug 2018 I woke up in pain around 0800. I decided to take my morning meds early. I used the bathroom. My mother was eating breakfast and my sister was doing something in the kitchen. She was walking all around so I have no idea what she was doing. I went back […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

3 Aug 2018 04.08.2018 01:51:08

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
3 Aug 2018 I left my house around 920 and didn’t come home till around 1645. It was a long day. I made breakfast and packed a lunch. I didn’t finish it all so I might have it for dinner. I wore my black air cast in a white sneaker and my white AFO in […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

2 Aug 2018 04.08.2018 01:51:08

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
2 Aug 2018 I left my house around 920 and didn’t come home till around 1645. It was a long day. I made breakfast and packed a lunch. I didn’t finish it all so I might have it for dinner. I wore my black air cast in a white sneaker and my white AFO in […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Sprained Ankle? Sprained ankle 03.08.2018 03:59:54

coffee bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome ces cauda equina syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Sprained ankle? So yesterday, I tripped over my own foot. It had gone inward and I lurched forward. I knew it was more than it because I felt like I moved something and it was painful. Later last night, my foot was hurting and I looked at my foot and it was pretty swollen. I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

1 Aug 2018 02.08.2018 03:56:05

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain
1 Aug 2018 I thought of a neat title for yesterday’s blog, but I was so tired, I never got to write it. I wrote it while I was at Starbucks today because I messed up my appointment time with my therapist but I have been goofing off on the internet the last 2 hours […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Back to 1989 craze 31.07.2018 00:32:01

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Back to 1989 craze Taylor Swift was at Gillette Stadium last week. In her honor, I have been playing her album 1989 and once again, I am addicted to it. It has been mostly what I have been playing, unless another song pops in my head, like a Luke Combs song. I think I like […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Flare Sunday 29-July-18 30.07.2018 03:26:36

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Flare Sunday My sister called me while I was in deep sleep. She wanted to know who was making noise. There was someone in my house but I wasn’t about to go downstairs to find out who it was. I said it was probably my other sister. It was. She left me a note about […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Rambling 29 July 2018 29.07.2018 07:07:35

mental illness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome ces cauda equina syndrome crps depression baseball disability chronic physical pain mood disorders blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Rambling 29 July 2018 I didn’t do much yesterday but sleep because I didn’t go to sleep till 5 am. I had a bad night of pain. I sent an email to my psych around 4 and then took an Ativan and that finally got me to sleep. I put my phone on do not […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Losing my mind with not being able to walk like I used to 28.07.2018 01:44:05

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression back pain disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Losing my mind with not being able to walk like I used to I had a pretty decent sleep. I fell asleep soon after the ball game. They lost. I was so tired that I just laid down and was soon asleep for the first time in a long time. I kind of woke up […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

doing laundry all day 27.07.2018 01:26:34

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression back pain disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Doing laundry all day The hamper was full so I decided to do laundry. I started it before my groceries were delivered. I didn’t separate the clothes until after the groceries were put away. I had to take breaks because it was so damn hot in the kitchen and my back was giving me grief. […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

about today’s therapy session 26.07.2018 03:02:29

therapist therapy mental illness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) psychotherapy complex regional pain syndrome crps depression psychological pain disability chronic physical pain mood disorders psychotherapist suicidality blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
After I wrote my blog last night, I stayed up for maybe an hour and then I crashed. I was so wiped out and knew if I fought it, I was going to get overtired and then sleep whenever. So I basically fell asleep by 2130. But fucking stupid pain woke me at 0100. Again […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Busy day 25.07.2018 02:08:25

mental illness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Busy day My cousin called me around noonish wanting to know if I still needed to go to Stop and Shop. I said I did. I only had to pick up a few things. My mother also wanted me to return the bottles and can for recycles. I get there and there is an elderly […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

randomness 23 July 18 24.07.2018 02:10:33

therapist therapy bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) psychotherapy complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders psychotherapist physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Randomness 23 July 18 I sent off an email to my psychiatrist sometime last night as I was in so much pain and I was angry. I told her I didn’t want to see her and to say this email is notification of cancellation of our next appt. I eventually went to sleep sometime after […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

tired f this shit 24.07.2018 06:22:48

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Tired of this shit I took my extended release med an hour later than I was supposed to. I was in the middle of doing something so forgot to take it. I had a peanut butter and fluff sandwich for supper and now the peanut butter is giving me horrible gas pains. Happens whenever I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

tired of this shit 24.07.2018 06:22:48

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Tired of this shit I took my extended release med an hour later than I was supposed to. I was in the middle of doing something so forgot to take it. I had a peanut butter and fluff sandwich for supper and now the peanut butter is giving me horrible gas pains. Happens whenever I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Sunday Blog 22 July 18 23.07.2018 02:10:56

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Sunday blog 22 July 2018 I was having some kind of dream and then in the dream, my ankle started hurting me. I woke up and sure enough, my ankle was hurting. I don’t know why. It was raining so maybe that was the reason. Rain is supposed to happen most of the week. I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Saturday Blog 21 July 2018 22.07.2018 03:59:38

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Saturday Blog 21 July 2018 Plain and simple, I didn’t do nothing today. Well, nothing exciting. I washed the dishes I didn’t do yesterday and then I emptied the dishwater. It took me about an hour to do the dishwasher because my back kept acting up from standing. I find it easier to put away […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Night out 21.07.2018 04:02:24

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression chronic physical pain mood disorders bipolar depression physical pain blogging blog chronic pain
I had another rough night sleeping and woke up via my med alarm, took meds, and went back to sleep. I got up around noon and made something to eat. I also made a cup of tea. I would be having espresso so I didn’t want to make coffee. I checked on my niece but […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

What if I live? 20.07.2018 02:17:59

mental pain suicide attempt hopelessness mental illness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression psychological pain psychache disability chronic physical pain mood disorders suicidality suicide ideation blogging suicide chronic pain chronic illness
What if I live? Been thinking seriously of ending my life in a few weeks. I plan dates. It helps me cope knowing I have some date to look forward to so I know the misery will end. Usually this happens in a state of despair when my pain levels are high and all I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

just a similar day 18.07.2018 23:24:09

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Just a similar day I saw my mother this morning. She was in pain but doing better than I expected. She will be in the hospital till Friday and then go to rehab. I think she is there just to keep an eye on her sugars and such. Last night I really missed her and […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

One More Light 18.07.2018 05:04:59

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression psychological pain psychache chronic physical pain mood disorders suicidality physical pain suicide ideation blogging writing suicide blog chronic pain chronic illness
One More Light ****expressions of suicide in this blog are just that. I am blowing off steam, expressing myself because keeping it in hurts too much**** This song by Linkin Park recently won an award for something I cannot remember. I saw it a couple of days ago. I am not surprised as when I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

hot day turns into T-storms 18.07.2018 01:06:53

coffee bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic illness
Hot day turns into T-Storms I woke up around 10. My mother was already at the hospital. I had a bad night of sleeping and pain. I had already told her if I slept and didn’t have pain, I would go. She understood as there was little for me to do at the hospital anyways. […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

A Pissy and Muggy Monday 17.07.2018 02:24:06

hopelessness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
A Pissy and Muggy Monday I woke up at 0530 from a strange dream, which I do not recall presently. I had to use the bathroom and when I came back, my foot started hurting. I took a breakthrough med but didn’t want to go back to sleep as I knew I would wake up […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Sunday Blog 15-July-18 16.07.2018 00:28:18

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Sunday Blog 15 July 2018 Only thing I did today was go to Walgreens. My sister made dinner so after I showered, I went downstairs. I didn’t want to go because I didn’t want a flare but my niece called and I couldn’t say no. Food was good. I had a cappuccino after I ate. […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

pained and pissed off 15.07.2018 02:13:58

hopelessness psychiatry bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders psychiatrist suicidality physical pain suicide ideation blogging writing blog chronic pain chronic illness
Pained and pissed off I didn’t go to sleep till 0700. I woke up around 1000. I sorted out my meds and as there was a threat of increased pollen, I took an extra Allegra. I then made breakfast and coffee. I was so sleepy after the coffee that I decided to take a nap. […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

painsomnia ramble 14.07.2018 11:19:28

hopelessness mental illness bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders suicidality physical pain suicide ideation blogging writing suicide blog chronic pain chronic illness
Painsomnia ramble It is almost 0500. I have yet to sleep. I thought I would write to see if that would help me fall asleep. I went to have something to eat and as I turned to walk back to the stairs, my ankle gave out on me. I couldn’t bear weight on it. It […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Lazy Friday 14.07.2018 00:28:12

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Lazy Friday I had a hard time sleeping. I was feeling really achy and couldn’t get comfortable. Around 7 I decided to take my morning meds early so I could sleep. I slept till noon. I wanted coffee and made some. I then made something to eat. I kind of overcooked my eggs as I […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

did a ot of little things 13.07.2018 00:07:41

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Did a lot of little things I woke up around noon. I had decided to make something to eat. Then I made coffee. I used my sister’s Keurig but she didn’t have sugar so I had to bring the cup back upstairs. I was using my BFF’s mug, which my mother had thrown in the […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

did a lot of little things 13.07.2018 00:07:41

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Did a lot of little things I woke up around noon. I had decided to make something to eat. Then I made coffee. I used my sister’s Keurig but she didn’t have sugar so I had to bring the cup back upstairs. I was using my BFF’s mug, which my mother had thrown in the […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com

Luke Combs has a hold over me 12.07.2018 01:42:13

bipolar disorder crps (formerly rsd) complex regional pain syndrome crps depression disability chronic physical pain mood disorders physical pain blogging blog chronic pain chronic illness
Luke Combs has a hold over me Yesterday, all I did while I was traveling throughout Boston, was listening to Luke Combs deluxe album. Past hour or so, I had a song running through my head. Just a few words but I couldn’t figure out what song it was. I had to wait for it […]... mehr auf midnightdemons7.wordpress.com